6 Tips for Getting the Most from Doctor Visits

In part 1 of this two-part series, I introduced five excellent doctor referral lists featuring more than 5,000 practitioners recognized for their exceptional care. These physicians have built reputations for truly listening to their patients and/or for taking additional holistic training to help them better understand complex conditions such as CFS, fibromyalgia, and Long COVID—making them an invaluable resource for anyone seeking compassionate, knowledgeable medical support.

In this part 2, I'll explain how to get the most benefit from each visit with your doctor.

Does this scenario sound familiar?You go to a physician and say that you have fibromyalgia. The doctor looks at you quizzically and asks, "Fibro Malaysia?" You begin listing your first dozen symptoms. By the third symptom, the doctor’s eyes glaze over, and they start anxiously looking at the door trying to figure out how to escape. Sometimes even implying that because they don’t know what’s wrong with you, you must be crazy !

An all-too-common experience with these conditions…

I’m going to start by noting that gaslighting is never acceptable. By that I mean when your physician implies to you or your family member that they can’t figure out what is wrong with you , so you must be a bit crazy. At that point, it is reasonable to note to the practitioner that gaslighting is considered abusive and unacceptable. If it continues, simply (and calmly – otherwise they will just blow you off) note that you find this behavior abusive and will report it. And then leave.

The beauty of online grading/rating sites for physicians is that this allows you to hold them accountable.

But the goal is to get the treatment you need. Although it may take some searching, there are doctors who are willing and able to help you. Here are simple tips to help you get the maximum benefit from each visit with your doctor.

6 Practical Tips to Get the Most From Every Doctor Visit

1. Recognize the knowledge gap, but don't tolerate gaslighting.

Many doctors are unfamiliar with CFS and fibromyalgia. It's fine if a physician honestly admits they don't know much about these conditions. What's not okay is gaslighting, implying nothing is wrong with you or that your symptoms are “all in your head.” If that happens, it’s time to find another doctor.

2. Ask (politely) to record the appointment.

Before your visit, learn how to record audio on your phone. At the appointment say something like:

“Because of my brain fog, it’s hard to remember everything you explain. Would you mind if I record our visit so I can review your recommendations later? I value your guidance, and it's important to me that I remember it correctly.”

Most doctors will understand. If yours declines, respect that. Then ask them to write down their key recommendations for you.

3. Focus on just a few priorities.

Doctors typically have only 10–15 minutes per appointment (including reviewing records and updating charts). Pick one to three key concerns for each visit, such as “Today I’d like to discuss sleep and pain.” You can always schedule follow-ups for other issues.

4. Request a few specific treatments for your symptoms. For example:

When talking with your doctor, it helps to suggest a few concrete options rather than leaving things open-ended. Here are three approaches you can take:

• Common and straightforward treatments. Example: “Could I try Flexeril, 5 mg, taking a half tablet or full tablet at bedtime for sleep and pain?” For widely used medications like this, you usually don’t need to bring outside research.
• Less familiar or off-label uses. Example: “Low-dose naltrexone (LDN), 3 mg at night, has helped many people. Could you prescribe 50 mg tablets so I can crush them to make the smaller dose?” In these cases, it’s helpful to bring a supporting article, such as a scientific review, to share with your doctor.
• More controversial options. For treatments that go against standard guidelines, like prescribing antibiotics or thyroid medication without typical test results, it’s reasonable to ask. But understand your doctor may not agree. Some patients choose to consult a holistic or integrative physician for these approaches.

5. Bring a trusted companion.

A friend or family member can offer emotional support and help capture key details in notes.

6. Give your doctor a printed question list.

Type out your questions ahead of time and bring two copies, one for you and one for your doctor. It’s faster and more efficient for the physician to read through your list and respond than for you to ask each question separately. (If you’re recording, they can move through the list even more quickly.)

These steps will help you leave every appointment with clearer guidance and less stress.

Free Information Sheets to Help Your Recovery

For free information sheets on how to recover from conditions discussed in the 2-part series above, email me at fatiguedoc@gmail.com and ask for the information sheet(s) pertinent to your situation. Key ones would be:

• CFS, fibromyalgia, and Long COVID recovery
• Addressing organ injury or shortness of breath in Long COVID
• Sensitivities/MCAS
• POTS
• Addressing chronic pain
• Neuropathy
• Recovering on a tight budget

Just let me know which of these you would like.